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We all have dreams and goals. Some of those dreams are big and some not so much. Are you on track to realize those dreams? Why not? I ask those two questions regularly when I am coaching. The most common answer I hear to the “on track” question is “kinda”. That is not an appropriate answer to a yes/no question. How can you be kinda on track? You are either on track or not on track. That means the real answer to the question is, No. In that case it is time to start digging to figure out what is keeping them from being on track. Often it comes to the fact that they are worried or scared of something that is in their path on the way to that dream.

When we are fearful or scared a natural response is to turn away or stop. In the case of reaching for your dreams or goals this is one of the last things you want to do. Instead we need to square our feet and identify what is that we fear. Is it the fear of failure? How about the fear of having to do the work that that will lead to your dreams? Or is it something completely different? The key is to know what you are fearful of and what’s keeping you from moving forward toward what you want. As soon as you understand what it is, the fear ceases to be as daunting as it once was because you can create a plan to get passed it.

It is important to remember when creating your plan to segment it out. You don’t have to create a detailed plan that takes you all way to the realization of your dreams and goals. Stealing from the movie What About Bob it is about the baby steps. Identify what you need to do today or this week to keep you moving forward. By keeping the chunk size small you can see the progress you are making.

Of course, there will be roadblocks on the path to what you want even with the best plan. When that happens, there is no need to worry. It is part of the process and in fact those blocks often become sources of pride once you have gotten past them. A key thought here is that you will get past them. It starts by having max belief in yourself and your capabilities knowing that you can break the problem down and find a way around it, over it, or through it.  You may need to call in reinforcements at this point. Maybe a friend a teammate or a coach who can help. Realize even though it is your dream or goal you don’t have to do it alone. You can and should use the resources around you. When you have support it is hard to be scared because you can rely on that support to get you through.

Even with a plan and the support of those around that fear can occasionally creep back into the mind. Here are a couple of things that you should do to keep that from happening. Go see your success. Daily, take a trip in your mind. Take a couple of minutes each day to close your eyes or keep them open and travel to the future in your mind to the time you will have achieved your dream. See what you are going to see when you accomplish it, hear what you are going to hear from those around and what you are telling yourself. Really feel the feelings that you will have when you get there. Allow the energy from that moment seep into you. While you are there turn and look to the past and see how you persevered and overcame the issues and roadblocks that could have gotten in your way. As you do this you might even notice that those challenges weren’t as big as you might of thought. When you see your success daily it is pretty much impossible to be fearful of not getting to where you want to be.

Train yourself to focus on what you want. Most people spend an inordinate amount of time on making sure they stay away from what they don’t want or don’t want to do. Which makes me think of the saying “your energy flows to where your attention goes”. If you are focused on what you don’t want to happen and your energy is flowing to that of course fear and doubt can creep in. Make the decision that you are going to focus on the dream and the activities that will take you there. There will be detours on the road to your dream. When you stay focused on the goal instead of the block you will find your way through that detour.

Be fearless in the pursuit of your dreams and goals. Visit successfully achieving them daily. Take the energy from the visit and put it into play in the plan you have built to get you there. Believe in yourself and your ability. Believe in those around who will help you get there.  When you do the fear will be nowhere to be found.

Remember your energy flows where your attention goes. Focus on what you want.

If you want additional information on how to let go of the fear or other negative emotions that are keeping you from reaching your goals reach out to me. As a Master Practitioner of NLP and Time Line Coaching® I have the experience, knowledge and tools to help. You can reach me by sending an email to kirk@maxbelief.com or give me a call at 515-499-6455.

Sometimes it feels like we are in the movie Groundhog Day with Bill Murray. We repeat the same day over and over again. We get up at the same time, do the same routine: go to work, workout, dinner, then back to bed just to start it all over again.

Here is my challenge for you this month. Change things up a bit. If you have been doing the same thing at the gym for the past year add in a new exercise or add some sprints to your morning run once or twice a week. At work change the time you eat lunch or where you eat lunch. Say something nice to the person that drives you crazy. Do something to change the monotony of the day.

This is easy for me to say but change is difficult. Change is challenging and that is exactly why we need to do it. When you change your workout you challenge new muscles that may not be as strong as those around it. When we build all the muscles it gives us better balance. This is why we need to look to change things up in other areas of our lives as well. Balance is good in life just as it is in the gym or on a run.  

You can change! Not only can you change, you can change for the better. The first step to do this is to decide what changes you want to make. Once you know, build your plan to make it a reality. Then slowly and constantly take the actions that will bring about the desired difference (A good coach can really help in this area and I happen to know a great one at GCG).

When you accomplish what you want and look back on the changes that you have made to make it to your goals, the feeling is incredible.

It all starts with a subtle change and builds over time. Just like in Groundhog Day. Bill Murray’s character had to try many different things until he found the right combination to get him past that day and on to the life he wanted. You can do the same.

Remember your energy flows to where your attention goes! Focus on what you want!

 If you have any questions or comments contact me at kirk@maxbelief.com or post them in the comment section.

Take ownership of you by living life on the cause side of spectrum.

 I was on Facebook the other night and was reading through a number of posts. I was struck by how many “woe is me” posts are out there. It is amazing to see so many people blaming others, the weather, or the world in general for their problems. Those people are living on effect side of the spectrum. In Dr. Alan Zimmerman’s book Pivot he states “If it’s to be, it’s up to me, in other words you are responsible for your life, good or bad.”

On the effect side you passively sit by and take what the world gives you. Being passive is easy but is easy really all that matters? When you chose the cause side of the equation you own the situations you are in.  You realize that you got yourself into them and have the ability to make that situation whatever you want by the actions you take. Think about the power gives you and how you can use that power to shape the direction you are going.

When we accept that we are at cause it gives us great power on where we can go. I did a triathlon last summer and fell completely apart during the run. It was hot and humid, I overheated and melted. On the effect side, I failed because of the intense heat, not my fault right I can’t control the weather. When looking at is from the cause side I melted because I did not train and prepare myself to run in those conditions. Big difference in those thought processes. The key with cause is you own the responsibility and also own the LEARNING that comes with it. In my example I learned I need to train the right way so I can handle the heat.

Know where you want to go and cause the actions that will take you there. Remember your energy flows where your attention goes.

In the crazy world that we live in there is negativity everywhere you look and it is easy to fall prey to it. When it is all around us it seeps into our thoughts and can take us over. This thought process can be dangerous as we strive to reach our goals.

Over the years I have coached and trained thousands of people and one of things that has stood out to me is that people are capable of so much more than they realize. The issue is that they have let doubt and negativity slip into their minds which has curbed their ability to believe in themselves. This leaves the big question of how do I keep positive and believe in myself when the world is stacked against me?

This can be an easy question to answer if you are willing to accept it. The first thing to do is realize that it is your choice. You make the choice each day on how you want to feel and if you want to believe in you. When you wake up in the morning you have a choice on how you embrace your day. It is easy to choose to be tired, cranky, or lazy. It takes more effort to choose to be excited for the day ahead and positive about what the results will bring. When you consciously make the choice for energy and positive results day after day it becomes a habit. In addition, when you make that choice it sets up a barrier to some of the negativity that comes at you. During your day limit your exposure to the negativity that is around. If you have a co-worker or friend who is negative consciously stay away from them. If you can’t physically separate from them tell yourself that it is “ok to delete the negative comments and actions from X.” When talking to people ask them questions about how they have succeeded.  Here is a key one find someone who believes in you and when needed use that belief to push you.

Today had a call from a person who I coached. He is doing a major presentation later this week. He reached out to me and told me about his presentation and how excited he was for it. He also told me he was scared he was going to get beat up by the executive team over the material. What he needed to hear was “I believe in you”. This allows him to believe in himself and now walk into the presentation confident that the outcome will be positive.

You are capable of more than you know. I believe in you. Keep the negativity away and believe in yourself. Believe that you are capable of hitting the goal in front of you. Focus on what you want, knowing there will be roadblocks. Believe you can overcome them and keep going.

Remember your energy flows where your attention goes.

If you would like some help figuring out your path forward and how to become more confident and competent on your path send me an email at kirk@maxbelief.com or give me a call at 515-499-6455.